How many times did you buy certain products because they looked so convincing on tv or print only to find out that these  products were not effective?  Naturally, companies manufacture products to be consumed, no one would want to purchase flawed or mediocre items.

How bout on Facebook, how many of your friends on Facebook admit on their statuses that they are cheating on their partners?  or that they are thinking of committing suicide?  or getting rejected (from work,school,relationsip)? flunking algebra or English grammar in class?  suffering from post partum depression or substance abuse?  Unlinkely.

Because from what I have observed, most people filter what they say on the net. Our friends mostly announce positive things which make the other people, ones not super close to them, believe in the idea that life’s perfect for these individuals.  By choosing which photos to upload and thoughts to write, we keep an appearance.

Mantendo Aparencias, a Portugese sentence, means keeping up an appearance.  I have learned from experience that maintaining an appearance a particular image can be very tiring.  Sometimes I just wanted to shout and tell people to shut up and get real.

My site contains writings in Portugese under the Blast from the Past category and chosen/copied articles in English found on Random Thoughts. They all vary. I do hope you enjoy my blog and please feel free to touch base with me via the Contact Me page. Mantendo Aparencias Privacy Policy 2011.  You may use the navigation panel on your right for detailed breakdown of my blog’s pages/posts.

My name is Ava and welcome to Mantendo Aparencias.

1. He’s brilliant at eye contact
Eye contact is extremely seductive – and no-strings men know this. These players are all about getting sex, and they’ll only stay for breakfast if it involves hand relief and a quick goodbye.

Players are masters of body language. They know to lean in as you speak, to brush your arm with theirs and let your knees touch for a moment longer than necessary. Most of all, they’re very good at eye contact.

A guy who wants you for more than sex will be too nervous for all this stuff. He’ll get goose bumps and mess up his words. He’ll find it especially hard to meet your eye, because it’ll make him blush like a baboon’s bum.

2. He talks about himself more than about you
He wants to impress you, because that’s his way into your knickers. He’ll bang on about his exotic travels, his amazing career and the time he lit a cigarette for Jeremy Clarkson.

But he doesn’t want to know much about you beyond whether you can cross your ankles behind your head. He may ask about your housemates, but only as research for when he invites himself back for coffee.

3. He avoids serious topics
He won’t discuss personal matters, because he doesn’t want to run the risk of you hugging him or, horrors, opening up your own baggage. If he mentions his ex, it’s only because he’s not over her and wants a rebound fling.

4. Friends aren’t part of the conversation
A no-strings man doesn’t want to involve you in his life. His friends are more important than you are, so he won’t chat to you about them and he certainly won’t introduce you. If your friends were to turn up in the pub, he’d make his excuses and leave.

5. He chooses your date venue
It’s especially easy to spot a player if you go to the cinema. A man who joins you for a chick flick is either gay or really interested in you. A man who insists on seeing Watchmen – when you don’t know what Watchman is – is only taking you to the pictures because he wants sex afterwards.

6. He’s dismayed by a gift
If you’ve been chatting online for a while, you might think it’s nice to bring along a little pressie. Big risk.
If he opens it with blushing pleasure and says ‘my turn next time,’ you’re doing well. If he says ‘you shouldn’t have,’ goes silent and looks uncomfortable, he’s terrified that you’re about to start sending out wedding invitations.

7. He asks you to go Dutch
This is a tricky one. Not all bill-splitting men are just after sex, and not all bill-payers are after a relationship. In fact, lavishing you with drinks and dinner is part of the player’s sex-getting strategy.
However, our quick poll of male daters revealed that most men would want to ‘treat you’ and ‘be the man’ on a first date if they wanted a relationship. ‘I’d only ask a woman to go Dutch if I didn’t care what she thought of me,’ says Simon, 38. ‘We’d split the bill, have sex and say goodbye in the morning. Casual and independent.’

8. He can’t keep his hands off you
If you’re on a 10th date with a guy who can’t control his public displays of affection, lucky you! Always nice to have a boyfriend who thinks you’re the sexiest thing alive.

But most men will only paw you on a first date if they don’t want a relationship. They know that women want gentlemen, but if they’re only after sex they don’t care about the impression they’re making.

9. He doesn’t chat or cuddle after sex
Once he’s got you back to his place (or yours) for sex, it’ll be fast and furious. He won’t spend time worrying about how to please you, because he’s the one who counts. Afterwards, he’ll roll over and sleep the sleep of the thoroughly shagged.

10. He doesn’t call
If a man doesn’t call after you had sex on a first date, it doesn’t mean that he’s shy or playing hard to get. It means he’s got what he wanted. Recommended reading: He’s Just Not That Into You.

A man who really likes you will call, probably within 24 hours of your first date. It won’t be a booty call, either. He’ll want to chat, and to hear the sound of your voice, and he’ll be terrified. Be nice to him – he could be around for a while.

Family is the country of the heart Gussepi Martini

We spent so much of our lives in exile but on the holidays we make the pilgrimage home, to the nation of
our heart, wherever that may be.

No such thing as perfect holiday because all holiday is all about the same thing- connecting to the people that care about you. Feeling like youre a part of something, family, a community, culture.

Quoted from Being Erica, Season 3, Episode 13

One of the most recently released movies that have perhaps hit home (cringe!), so to speak, is the low-budget “Dream for an Insomniac” starring Ione Skye and Jennifer Aniston. Try to rent a copy of this movie not because of the talent of those who starred in it but because of the dialogue. One of those lines which bore a hole in my heart was, and I quote (not verbatim, though): “I don’t want to be sixty years old and married to my second-best choice, wondering what ever happened to the one who got away.” This is just one of the two great lines in that movie. I’ll tell you what the other one is later. Meantime, let me concentrate on this line-the line that sends chills down your spine once you decide to spend more than five seconds thinking about it.

Have you ever wondered what it must feel like married to the one you settled on? This truly gives me great feelings of anxiety. It might be difficult to accept the word “settle” because it conjures up images of quasi-happiness and half-hearted glee. Yes, there is some sort of satisfaction and perhaps, some feeling of security that can be derived from such a partnership but I wonder, could there be anything more?

To settle is to ultimately accept what is within reach, what is available, what is there. To settle is to convince one’s self that the decision about to be made is inevitable, realistic, and safe. To settle is to risk not ever being truly happy because one decides to adopt the worst type of devil-may-care attitude on life’s greatest challenges. And settling is a sorry consequence of the passage of time. Yes, time can be the balm that soothes open, painful wounds in one’s heart but it can also be that dark force that manipulates one’s mind into thinking and believing that the choice one has made is the best choice… the only choice. What time does, and I’m sure you’ll agree, is it lodges one’s mind and heart in a cage with the door partly open-with the promise of a better life losing its appeal over the reality of the present, the convenient, and the routine. Time also pressures one into selecting a suitor or spouse because ‘wala nang iba’ (there is no one else) and ‘nagmamadali na ako’ (I’m in a hurry) and there, puwede na rin.’ (I’ll make do).

The wickedness of “settling” is not one way. It also eventually hurts the one who was chosen because in all respects, the truth will surface. You no doubt realize that you just wasted each other’s time and emotions. But then again, if your spouse chose you not because he or she “settled,” then forget about the win-win situation you were gunning for.

Frankie (Lone Skye) delivered that line in the movie when she was deciding whether or not to do everything possible to win David Shrader’s heart. David happened to be involved with someone else. He was attracted to Frankie but didn’t really think it wise to split up with his girlfriend of three years on a limb. Very much unlike you and me, Frankie is very atypical of the Rules Girl. She went for David, bared her soul, and tried to convince him that he will only be happy with her. She then gave him the other great line in the movie to make him leave his girlfriend for her. “Anything less than mad, passionate love is a waste of my time.” I leave the ending open for you to discover.

Wow! Many times, in my not too colorful past, I almost gave in to the urge to tell the boy I liked what I felt for him. In all those times, I opted otherwise for fear of my mother’s wrath and, of course, embarrassment in case of rejection. I am scared of losing my precious dignity and pride in case he tells me that he only sees me as a friend.

I’m sure you got through these exercises in your psyche too. Sometimes, our hearts win out over our brains when our certainty over the outcome is great. I try to espouse The Rules and very rarely make the first move. More often than not, I wait for the guy to call. Now you know that I’m one of those who walk the avenues of life on a sidewalk-never off it.

Now, I’m starting to believe otherwise. I see the beauty in sharing your feelings with the one you love – not because you expect something in return but because life cannot be loved otherwise. It is a great, big step for an otherwise conservative, ‘torpe’ girl like you and me but if you think about it, it’s the only way to go.

Richard Paul Evans’ bestseller after The Christmas Box – The Locket – tells us the story of a woman who fell in love with a soldier when they were both very young. They shared their feelings with each other and were very happy. Eventually, he went off to war and she married somebody else, thinking he wouldn’t return to her. Years passed and they lived their separate lives-he married and had a family while the woman’s husband and son eventually succumbed to illnesses and died.

She decided to wait for her soldier’s wife to die before she came back to him-because she didn’t think it was right to complicate his life. The wait took more than sixty years until she eventually found the announcement of his wife’s death in the obituary. By this time, the woman was already 80 and could barely walk. Sadly, by the time she managed to find her soldier to tell him she loved him, he was already senile. The woman eventually died a few days after seeing her soldier and perhaps going through the most heart-wrenching experience in her life. She was too late.

The morals of the stories I have mentioned above are similar and almost connected to each other. Perhaps another book theme that we can tie into these is that line from The Bridges of Madison County – “This kind of certainty comes but once in a lifetime.”

I am of the belief that each person is given the chance to find his one true love as he goes about his life. Sometimes, the opportunity is not too obvious, especially for those who are content with their situation and therefore are not seeking “greener pastures.” These times, the chance is often passed up.

The luckier ones are those who are probably more clear-minded and in touch with their emotions because they can easily recognize what is staring them in the face. Whether this chance is passed up or not, I know that the feeling one gets when this chance is still within reach is one of certainty. Yes, it is also accompanied with feelings of danger, of risk, and of possible pain but compensating for this is that inexplicable “sureness,” that sense of profound happiness that has never been derived anywhere else but from that one person who just happened to pass by in your tidy little life.

I call true love a gift because of its rarity. It does not happen everyday. If you pass it up the first time, try not to be too arrogant to look away when it comes by the second time. You may ask me “how will I know if this is my true love?” My answer to that is this: True love is that strong, awesome feeling that scares the hell out of you but also always makes you unbearably happy.

It doesn’t go away, no matter how much you will it to. More than anything else, you’ll know in your heart when you meet her/him that she/he is the one. She/He doesn’t become the one the same way that soulmates do not become soulmates later in life. With her/him, you are damn certain that you are not settling. With her/him, you know that you will be sixty years old and never wondering about the one that got away because she/he never did. She’s/He’s right here holding your hand.

Some things are beyond planning.

And life doesn’t always turn out as planned.

You don’t plan for a broken heart. You don’t plan for a failed business venture. You don’t plan for an adulterous husband. You don’t plan for an autistic child.

You don’t plan for spinsterhood. You don’t plan for a lump in your breast.
You plan to climb the corporate ladder.

You plan to be rich and powerful. You plan to be acclaimed and successful.
You plan to fall in love – and be loved forever.

You don’t plan to be sad. You don’t plan to be hurt.

You don’t plan to be broke. You don’t plan to be betrayed.

You don’t plan to be alone in the world.

You plan to be happy. You don’t plan to be shattered.

Sometimes if you work hard enough, you can get what you want.

But most times, what you want and what you get are two different things.

We, mortals, plan but so does God in the heavens. Sometimes, it is difficult to understand God’s plans – especially when His plans are not in consonance with ours. Often, when God sends us crisis, we turn to Him in anger. True, we cannot choose the cross that God wishes us to carry but we
can carry that cross with courage knowing that God will never abandon us nor send something we cannot cope with.

Sometimes, God breaks our spirit to save our soul.

Sometimes, He breaks our heart to make us whole.

Sometimes, God sends us pain so we can be stronger.

Sometimes, God sends us failure so we can be humble.

Sometimes God sends us illness so we can take better care of ourselves.

Sometimes, God takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.

Make plans but understand that we live by God’s grace.

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it..

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn’t kill you, really does make you stronger.

19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone, everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.

35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

—–

Written by Adrian Tan, author of The Teenage Textbook (1988), was the guest-of-honour at a recent NTU convocation ceremony. This was his speech to the graduating class of 2008.
—–
I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that “Learning is a lifelong process” and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term “Karoshi”, which means death from overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are “making a living”. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan “Arbeit macht frei” was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.
You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

Everytime I plan a trip to a beach or resort, first thing I look at is the color of the water and the sand.  Upon deciding on which beach to go to, I seach for hotels on places I can stay at, part of what I consider  is the hotel’s proximity to the beach front.

Most hotels would advertise that it has “beach view”, well, based from experience, the advertised “beach view” could mean view of the beach even from the back of the island or the top of the highest hill, does not necessarily mean its easily accessible.

I remember the trip I had with a significant other in Boracay, the hotel we stayed at costs $400 US dollar a night, it was out first time to go the island so we relied on the internet, from the hotel’s website, it looked really posh and promised a beach front.

We chose to stay at this expensive place because we both thought that it would improve the “romance” and enhance our “Boracay experience” however when we got there it was a complete disappointment, the room we had was very far from the beachfront BUT had a tiny tiny beach view.

Lesson learned: does not matter where I am, does not matter where we stay, does not matter the cost, as long as we feel the moment and we make the most out of it.

Below are some of the photos of the island and the hotel we stayed at.

Você já se perguntou, porquê suas segundas-feira costumam ser logas e chatas (Não estou falando do seu companheiro de trabalho que é alto e foi apelidado de segunda-feira), porquê é o dia típico para você se atrasar ou porquê você já quis chutar tudo e ir vender cocô na praia?

Te respondo, você está mal empregado.

Não é mal empregado apenas no sentido financeiro, mas no sentido psicológico.

Você pode ter um excelênte salário, pode viajar pela empresa, pode trabalhar perto de sua casa, pode ter benefícios, pode ter diversos outros itens que a sociedade julga ser requesitos ideais para se avaliar se você está bem empregado, mas mesmo com tudo isso você ao acordar no domingo sofre ao pensar que amanhã é segunda.

Isso acontece porque você não gosta do que você faz ou não gosta da empresa que você trabalha.
A maior parcela da culpa por isso, é da empresa, ou digamos, da sua fonte de renda. As empresas lentamente estão acordando e percebendo que um funcionário feliz é um funcionário que produz mais, porém a grande maioria ainda trata os funcionários como meros “escravos vendedores de mão de obra” e que se não gostarem de como são tratados haverão outros para tomar seu lugar. Sim haverão outros, mas serão outros que terão o mesmo tipo de problema, não produzirão o que podem…

As empresas precisam acordar e perceber que seus funcionários são a roda matriz de seu negócio, que um funcionário feliz, é um funcionário que trabalha mais e melhor, produz mais e com menos erros.

Lentamente algumas empresas passaram a entender a verdadeira razão da área dos recursos humanos, estão percebendo que o RH não é DP, que o RH cuida do bem-estar dos colaboradores, afinal essas pessoas passam no mínimo 6 horas dentro da empresa.

Quando será que todas as empresas passaram a ver seus funcionários como seres humanos? Dúvido que estarei vivo para ver isso.

Agora, as empresas não são as únicas culpadas pela síndrome da segunda-feira. Você também o é. Uma vez que você tem o poder de mudar seu ambiênte de trabalho ou de empresa, tentem ver sua ocupação não como uma obrigação, mas como uma parte de seu dia. Um dia tem 24 horas, se contarmos que você trabalha 8, mais uma hora de almoço mais 2 horas de trajeto, menos 8 horas de sono, te restam 5 horas para viver, por que não aproveitar as outras horas?

Barracos entre mulheres povoam a imaginação masculina desde quando o macaco percebeu que descascar a banana era mais prático que engolir ela inteira. Lolitinhas com travesseiros nas mãos se batendo e pulando em cima de uma cama uma por cima da outra rindo. Realmente esse clima Sex Night é muito encorajador, mas o que acontece na vida real não é nada elegante.

Sinceramente eu nunca achei um motivo aceitável para tal. Se esmurrar na rua ou adjacências por homem é o fim da auto estima. Claro que temos casos onde realmente uma mulher merece uma bifa, mas são casos isolados, num balanço geral das situações os motivos seguem as horizontais:

Homens

Para exmplificar essa linha de raciocínio (não tão lógico) cito uma cena de um barraco recente contado por uma fonte que preferiu ficar no anonimato (minha vizinha):

“É Ano Novo e alguns minutos passados da meia noite, eu já me sentia gratificada pelo clima de descontração que rolava entre a família do meu namorado e eu.

UFA! – eu pensava – Consegui passar pelo teste. Meu namorado meu pegou pelo braço e íamos, em direção à varanda, de repente percebo que meu namorado recebe um abraço caloroso no qual ficou estático, dei uma meia volta e vi que se tratava da PUTA da vizinha que vive dando em cima dele, e já cacarejou pra Deus e o Mundo que vai tomá-lo na primeira oportunidade. Essa Vaca não aprendeu, desde a primeira vez que batemos boca na rua e estava me pedindo porrada. Não contei conversa meu sangue subiu e bloqueou o meu cérebro de qualquer pensamento racional ou civilizado, voei em cima dela já fui dando um tapão e jogando ela no chão, puxava o cabelo dela como se fosse a ultima coisa que iria fazer na minha vida, depois de dar e levar algumas bofetadas, a adrenalina desceu um pouco e pude perceber que estava no meio de uma rodinha na frente da casa dele, homens gritavam ensandecidos:

Briga de Mulher!!!
Entre risos e dedos indicadores me apontando, vi a cara do meu namorado com um sorrisinho no canto da boca contando vantagem pro amigo, olhei em volta e vi minha sogra com um ar de indignação cochichando com outra bruaca e um vizinho totalmente excitado com a situação gritando: Se beijem logo.

Percebendo todo o ambiente em minha volta cruzo o olhar com minha adversária que já esta com a cara toda amassada, me dou conta de que foi o bastante pra acabar com a alegria de galinhar dela por uns três meses (é o máximo que alguém pode conseguir), depois da multidão dispersada, eu fico com cara de cachorro e termino a noite com um bundão do meu lado!”

Acho que antes de você voltar ao mundo da barbárie, pense bem se vale a pena lutar pelo que tem do lado. Brigas fazem mal não só fisicamente, mas acho um alienador de atitudes tremendo, uma falta de QI, homens brigam por tudo isso é fato, por futebol, no trânsito, na fila do mercado, no estacionamento do shopping, jogando carta, dentro do ônibus e por tantas outras bobagens, mas as mulheres, muito raramente brigam por outra coisa a não ser por HOMENS. Você lembra qual foi o último ‘pega-pra-capar’ entre duas mulheres? Foi por causa de homens, não foi? Eu sabia

PS: Deprimente!